D. Walls Say What?!?!

The Tea Party Is All About Race

admin — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 02:28:24 +0000

Growing up in the south it’s a given that I would have several friends that are “conservatives” and associate themselves with the RNC. My favorite would be Courtney who although our opinions differ at times is always up to debate anything respectfully and usually we both end up learning something new. But these days when I think of the conservatives of our country I am flooded with ideas of crazed Tea Party members fighting for god know what.

RNC's latest fear campaign.

What I do know is that they are using fear to spread their message and all that is doing is tearing the county apart. Granted most educated individuals won’t fall for these fear tactics but I worry about the other 40% of the country that doesn’t know any better and believes in these fear tactics and actually believes that President Obama is out to take away their civil liberties.

Now don’t get me wrong being an intelligent young man I don’t like throwing around the race card I think it belittles any valid point by using a crutch or past injustices to validate current ones. However, when you reflect on the currently anti-Obama campaigns going around you can’t help but wonder if it’s not all based solely on the fact that he is in fact an African American (literally & figuratively).

Now I leave you with this article from the Huffington Post that I found quite interesting by Bob Cesca continuing the discussion about the Tea Parties Race Issues…

**D.Walls**

Ask D. Walls

admin — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 17:00:02 +0000

Well it’s the beginning of a new week and as usual I am dispensing my personal, relationship, and life advice. It’s another week of Ask D. Walls, you have questions and I have answers!

Dear D. Walls,

I am 18 and a student. I recently slept with a guy at work and he has not paid attention to me since. I have totally fallen for him.

We have known each other since high school and he was always a little shy. Every since we got intimate he hasn’t even spoken to me let alone looked at me. Why won’t he speak to me, let alone date me?

~Confused in NC

Dear Confused,

How can I put this delicately… Mr. Shy only wanted one thing from you, and once you gave him what he wanted he was no longer interested in doing anything else with you.

My mother has always said, “what ever you do in the beginning of a relationship will be expected of you until the end of a relationship.” If it’s a long term relationship that you are after I would highly suggest that you don’t sleep with the guy on the first date. Once you open that door there is no closing it back.

Sorry,

D. Walls

Dear D. Walls,

I’ve known this guy for about 6 months and he’s my best friend. We have a lot of things in common and we just seem to click. There is one problem though, my friend who introduced us has liked him for 4 years.

He pretty much ignores her and spends time with me. I don’t know what to tell her. We are attracted to each other and we keep sneaking around so she won’t see us in town. I told her that I like him and she was upset. Is there an easy way to tell her we are becoming a couple?

~Friend b4 Him?

Well Friend b4 Him,

You pretty much told her when you told her that you liked him. I really hope your guy friend isn’t leading her on and playing with her heart at the same time.

But, if you both start spending time together as an established couple your friend will start to see what is happening. STOP sneaking around. If she ask tell her that you both have decided to take the next step and see where this relationship is going. She may need to withdraw from your friendship for a while but give her the room and she’ll come around.

Good Luck!

D. Walls

Dear D. Walls,

How do I tell my parents that I flunked out of school? I haven’t had the courage to tell them yet, I tried over Christmas break but never got the nerve so when January rolled around and it was time to go back to school I left. Since my rent is paid until May, I figured I can just stay here until then and tell my parents over the summer. But my parents are still sending me money every two weeks and lately I have felt like there is this huge boulder in the pit of my stomach.

~ College Woes

Dear College Woes,

Take it from someone that knows all about disappointing parents, the only way to get rid of an unpleasant task is to take a deep breath and do it. Since classes ended last December, you have had this hanging over you for the last two months – that’s a really long time to be carrying around this guilt. If I were in your shoes I would sit down with them privately and tell them what happened. I don’t imagine they’ll be happy, but it’s better to face them now with your own words than to have them hear about it from someone else.

Do the right thing.

D. Walls

Dear D. Walls,

I have been dating this guy over the net that I met on myspace. We are close and even told each other that we loved each other and we both really mean it. I am almost 16 and he is 18.

Now he won’t email me back or even try to find me on the net. I know he has a steady job but shouldn’t he make time for his “girlfriend”? Please tell me what to do.

~Lost in Love

Dear Lost in Love,

I wish I could tell you what is going on, but… I don’t know. From my personal experience and experiences from my friends I do know that internet romances are fickle and fall apart easily.

Sorry…

D. Walls

Well unfortunately that’s all for this week. You can email your questions to Dear D. Walls. Your response will be emailed back, by return address (unless otherwise instructed), usually within forty-eight hours. Your letter and the reply may also appear in one of my columns.

Ex Sex… Is Sleeping With An Ex Ok?

admin — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 17:00:53 +0000

Ok so I was watching Cougar Town the other night (don’t judge me, it’s super funny), and the episode mainly revolved around whether or not it’d be possible to have sex with an ex without one of the parties getting some of the old feelings back.

We all know how it goes, you promise yourself that you wouldn’t have anything to do again with the ex and removed any trace of the relationship from your home and of course facebook. Then one night it happens — you are out at a bar and run into your former partner. You have a few drinks and reminisce about old times and find yourself strangely aroused. The next morning arrives and you awaken to find the loser next to you in your bed, causing you to put a pillow over your head in regret. Your ex wakes up and says, “I had a great time with you. Do you want to do it again?”

Sound familiar? If you have slept with your ex-partner, you are not alone. It’s only natural to want to return to what’s familiar. How often have you heard someone say, “We never really got along — but the sex was great,” or “We had nothing in common except for the bedroom.”

Having sex with your ex isn’t necessarily a bad thing, provided you are able to keep things into an emotional perspective. For most of us however, this is a near impossibility given our relational history with the person and the harm they caused us. How do you avoid an emotional disaster when confronted with the decision of having “sex with the ex?” I am still trying to master this skill with no luck seeing as I constantly seem to run into ex’s, but before I do anything too stupid like hoping back into bed with them I ask myself the following 8 questions.

Will having sex with my ex cause emotional pain?
Is my ex trying to use sex as a way of getting back into a relationship?
Will I be repeating the same patterns of the past with this person by opening up the sexual door?
Will I be betraying any promises to myself by allowing this person into my life again, if even in a sexual capacity?
How will having sex with my ex cause me to feel afterwards?
Are my motives purely physical, or is there something more?
Will having sex with this person help me to create a sense of closure or a misguided sense of connection?
Am I having sex with the person because of repressed feelings of guilt for breaking off the relationship?

If you answered yes to any of these questions then sleeping with you ex is probably not a good idea. Not saying it won’t be fun, but it’s probably not the best idea because someone is going to develop feelings and it’s not going to end well.

There are plenty of fish out there in the sea so there’s no reason to keep reusing the same ones. So I’ll give up on my ex’s if you guys will, I will dedicate 2010 to meeting new and exciting people and to stop moving backwards to ex’s.

Until next time, have a good evening and a pleasant tomorrow!

~D. Walls

Can Will Power Alter Your Fate?

admin — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 16:01:15 +0000

A Guest Post By Lesley Parker

I believe that I am my biggest ally and my greatest historian.

Have you noticed the commercials on television regarding asbestos and mesothelioma? The commercials advises you that it’s some type of cancer but they never really tell you what type of cancer. According to www.survivingmesothelioma.com , “Mesothelioma is a rare form of cancer in which malignant (cancerous) cells are found in the mesothelium, a protective sac that covers most of the body’s internal organs.”¹

A family man, Rhio O’Connor was diagnosed with mesothelioma and given a life expectancy of one year. Rhio refused to accept such a limited fate. The conventional method was rounds of chemotherapy, to attempt to suppress the disease and allow him to live for approximately a year.His quality of life would not be great due to the side effects of chemotherapy. He studied his options and chose to use an alternative method of diet and health. He chose to eat organic food and take a vitamin regimen that would cost him $1000 a month.

The internet is your friend and your doctors should be too. If I were given a dire cancer prognosis, my first step would be to gain a full understanding of the diagnosis, the standard treatments and their side effects. In addition to the material that my doctor would give me, I would locate information about the diagnosis and treatment on sites like www.mayoclinic.com or www.webmd.com. Then I would Google by key words in the prognosis, studies, herbs and Chinese remedies to find alternatives options regardless of the standard therapeutic outlook. I feel the more informed I am, the more intelligent my conversation will be with my doctor when I make my decision on treatment. If my doctor is not willing to talk to me about options and studies and to ensure that I have a clear understanding of my prognosis, then I would find another doctor. Certainly, the doctors are more educated than I am in the medical field but it is called “Practice”. A doctor should be willing to work with me when determining my future. After all, it is my future. It is my decision to try an alternative method that offers some promise and a better quality of life rather than settling for the tradition dire prognosis process with a poor quality of life.

Often times, side affects of medications and treatment occur based on a persons genetic make-up. What happens to one person doesn’t necessarily happen to another. This is why I must know my history and am able to cite it like a quote. Only I know if I have had reactions to certain medications, allergies to foods or many other allergens. When I talk to doctors about taking a new medicine or even having surgery, I will point out simple allergens like scale fish. Scale fish sounds like it should not be an issue when taking medicine or having surgery but let me tell you why it is. Some pre-natal vitamins have fish oil in them. Also, a cleanser used during surgery can cause a reaction to the area surrounding the cut and is known to happen to people with fish allergies. In my case, I itched to the point of bruising while taking pre-natal vitamins and I blistered around my surgical scar because of the cleanser that was used. While neither of these were fatal, certainly my allergic reactions could have been far worse. Everyone should remember that they are their own historian and personal history is extremely important when dealing with any medical concern. I would even go as far as ensuring I’m around people who know me well before starting a new medication just in case there is a severe side effect.

Once I have completed my research, I would write down questions of clarity and concerns about side effects and reactions to ask my doctor during the meeting to make my decision. I pride myself on memory but in this type of dire situation, I feel it is extremely important to write down my questions and concerns. This way, I can guarantee that my important questions are answered. I would also bring articles with me if I found an alternative method that I felt would work better for me. This way, if the doctor has not had time to research the options, I would have something tangible to show them. It would be important to have the website available to ensure that your doctor has a place to follow up on your options. Sometimes, doctors may have a connection to get you into an alternative program that you would not be able to do yourself.

Rhio O’Connor was living proof that will power can alter your fate. He had the will to live longer than a grim fate that his doctors had advised was his short term destiny. He lived another seven and a half years by researching his options and choosing the treatment that he felt was best for him. Having been through two different life altering illnesses, and my refusal to sit and wait, is right in line with Mr. O’Connor. I feel that Rhio O’Connor’s story inspired me by reiterating that I was right to research my issues and not settle for the invasive traditional methods which may or may not have helped me overcome my issues. Life is too short to just accept the norm.

Happy Sunday!

admin — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 17:00:02 +0000

Here’s my Random Sunday Thoughts, I was talking to my youngest sister last night (while kicking some major butt in Wii Tennis), and she asked me if it’s true the world is going to end in 2012.

December 2012, the year the earth dies???

Now being the skeptic that I am, I explained to her that I survived Y2K, Bird Flu, Mad Cow, 9/11 and Swine Flu, and to be honest they are always coming up with some way that the world is going to end and humanity is going to disappear like the dinosaurs. I mean every crazy out their that believes everything from the moon is made out of cheese to The Men in Black was based on a true story will take a little piece of truth and turn it into something extremely… stupid.

But then I woke up this morning and google 2012, and under all the movie reviews there are countless (well more like 257,000,000) different articles about the subject.

I browsed a few and just obsorbed the information but I am still finding it hard to believe that the world is going to just have this hugely over dramatized ending like they are discribing.

So my question to you today is do you honestly believe that we only have two more years left of living and if so wouldn’t that cause lets say certain “rebellious people” to start doing what they really want to do since it’s all supposidely “going to end soon?”

Well until next time, have a good day and a pleasant tomorrow!

Goodbye 2009… Hello 2010!!!

admin — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 05:01:18 +0000

As we bring another year to a close lets take a moment to reflect on the year that was 2009. At midnight last night when we ushered in another year we’re not just saying good by to 2009 we’re saying good by to an entire decade.

An old Hopi saying goes “You must live your life from beginning to end. No one else can do it for you.”

20o9 was a extremely slightly depressing year for most average Americans, from the bad economy, home foreclosures, foiled terrorist plot, health care debates, and the many celebrity deaths it just wasn’t a good year for us here in the US of A.

But as we start the new year with a clean slate we can take this opportunity to remember all the things about 2009 we didn’t like and make a change for the better.

No more complaining 2010 is the start of a new decade and the start of new beginnings!

What are you looking forward to in 2010??

Sex and the City 2: Official Trailer

admin — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 19:34:16 +0000

Definitely think having Jay-Z and Alicia Keys‘ New York City anthem ‘Empire State” of mind in the background is too perfect! But enough from me check out the trailer and let me know what you think!

All I have to say is that I am officially ready for May so I can “Carrie On” with SJP and the Girls.

Are you as ready as I am???

The Perfect Christmas Present…

admin — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 23:04:42 +0000

Last night as I was watching SNL Presents: A Very Gilly Christmas (which I highly recommend you check out), and I was reminded of the best Christmas Present from SNL ever. I know this isn’t new… but it’s definitely one of the funniest SNL Digital Shorts EVER!! Well I think so anyway so check out the clip after the jump.

That is by far one of my favorite SNL Digital Shorts EVER!!!!

So as I prepare to spend the next few days snowed in I’ll share some of my favorite Christmas memories as well as get ready for my best of 09 list.

Move Over Hannah, iCarly is Taking Over

admin — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:48:04 +0000

Hannah Montana who?!

Nickelodeon’s one-hour iCarly special on Saturday, iQuit iCarly, was a HUGE ratings hit!

It drew 8.8 million viewers, including 4.7 million from ages 2-11, 3.9 million from 6-11, and 3.7 million from 9-14!

I don’t know how they do the break down but either way you look at Miranda Cosgrove and gang are way funnier and entertaining to watch then Hannah Montana. Something about the redneck double life thing got real old a few years ago, and Miley’s skankiness got old way before that.

Chris Brown Says The Industry Can Kiss His A$$

admin — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:00:31 +0000

I am just SPEECHLESS, so I’ll let Chris do the talking…

I swear someone needs to tell him to pull an R. Kelly, hell if R. Kelly can allegedly piss on someone (we’ve all seen the tape get over it), go to court and still be #1 on iTunes then I know C. Breezy can do it.

He just needs to disappear for a good 6 months to a year. Go luxuriate somewhere tropical cause it’s cold in the DMV right about now. And give people time to forget and forgive.

Every time I start to forget what happened he’s on t.v. talking about it, so Chris honestly you’re a cool dude just step back for a little while and stop pushing yourself on us.

D. Walls Say What?!?!

The Tea Party Is All About Race

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Ask D. Walls

Well it’s the beginning of a new week and as usual I am dispensing my personal, relationship, and life advice. It’s another week of Ask D. Walls, you have questions and I have answers!

Well unfortunately that’s all for this week. You can email your questions to Dear D. Walls. Your response will be emailed back, by return address (unless otherwise instructed), usually within forty-eight hours. Your letter and the reply may also appear in one of my columns.

Most Popular Posts

Ex Sex… Is Sleeping With An Ex Ok?

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Can Will Power Alter Your Fate?

A Guest Post By Lesley Parker

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Happy Sunday!

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Goodbye 2009… Hello 2010!!!

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Sex and the City 2: Official Trailer

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The Perfect Christmas Present…

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Move Over Hannah, iCarly is Taking Over

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Chris Brown Says The Industry Can Kiss His A$$

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